Travelin' Blues

A recent trip took me to Warsaw's Chopin Airport.  It was the height of the Euro 2012 championship, so I expected it to be mobbed, with lines snaking this way and that, and an extra layer of security checks just to make the whole thing that much hellish.  I was greeted by a near-empty terminal.  Waiting in line to check in?  Nope.  Going through security?  A breeze.  I actually arrived to the airport way to early, and had to burn off some extra time wandering around the building wondering where everyone was.

LOT E170s and E190s with a special Euro 2012 livery on their winglets and fuselages.

Getting those visitors off on the right foot.

In both terminals, it was kind of eerie the way that there were so few people.  I have never seen them this empty, except maybe when I had some 6:00 AM flight, and I got to the airport at 4:30.
I had heard about how some 500,000 fans were supposed to come through Warsaw (or something like that, I dunno').  Tourism was supposed to pick up, partly because of the weak zloty, and partly because of the beautification of the country.  Well, I saw no immediate effects.  We're just about in the middle of the tourist season, and they're just trickling in.  I chalk it up to the problems with Greece, Ireland, Spain, Italy, Portugal, and France (oh yes, they too have problems), but I don't have reams of proof to throw at you.  But, there have been several articles noting the downturn in travel within the Euro Zone.

No lines or crowds here.

There are a few people milling around, but everything is just about quiet.

By the way, the traffic in Warsaw isn't too bad, even on game days.

The Eleventh and Travels

I was particularly excited for this November, mostly because I thought I would be able to spend the 11th in Poland, which happens to be its Independence Day.  First off, you might ask why a nation that claims to be 1000-years old and whose inception started with the baptism of a king would need an independence day.  Well, it celebrates its independence from Germany, Austria, and Russia, which was secured on November 11th, 1918 (yes, the end of World War I), ending a partitioned rule of 123 years.  Next, you might ask why I would care at all since the Poles don't really have any super-fun holiday extravaganzas.  From what I've heard, Independence Day is just a day everyone stays at home and the military holds some token parades.  Meanwhile, the people in the States hold raucous parades for just about every holiday they can (Memorial Day, Thanksgiving Day, the Fourth of July, Veterans Day, St. Patrick's Day, Easter.)  Well, I've just never seen it, and I really wanted to see it.  Unfortunately, I was recalled to the US (on tragic circumstances) and spent the day (Veterans Day) hearing from veterans describing the free meal they got from Applebee's.  On the flipside, I did get to spend the Fourth of July in the States, instead of Poland as I have or the past couple of years (mostly by drinking a few beers and watching Gettysburg.  There's nothing more satisfyingly patriotic than watching the Confederates' dreams and hopes crushed on the battlefield.)

My journey to the States was surprisingly uneventful; everything went as smoothly as could be.  I flew Air France, and every flight was on time.  The layover in Paris was short enough and on both flights I didn't have to sit next to any horrible miscreants.  Even my passage through Customs was swift.  (Not that I'm plugging for Air France.  It was almost two years ago when they cancelled my flight from Paris to Warsaw on Christmas Eve and couldn't get me out until Christmas Day.  Then, they left my baggage in Paris.)
The trip from Boston to Rome (I flew Alitalia on the way back) was a different story.  The lass at the ticket counter  squeezed me up to seat 11A on account of the flight being full, which I immediately fantasized that I was bumped up to Business Class or the mythical First Class.  Unfortunately, I was relegated to the first seat of economy.  It wasn't all bad: there was no seat in front of me that would recline backwards and I got to exit rather quickly, plus I could stick my feet up on the partition.  The bad thing was the family across the aisle (and whose fat grandfather sat next to me) with the noisy toddlers.
I've never had a problem with kids on an air plane; if anything they're usually better than the horrible adults that usually ruin my flight.  The babies cry during takeoff and landing, but then quiet down after ten minutes and sleep the whole time.  These little brats didn't sleep at all and did nothing but talk really loudly and cry.  I mean, they. would. NOT. shut up.  Meanwhile, their loving parents proceeded to ignore them and continue to watch their movies.  The mother saw fit to change one of their diapers in the cabin instead of the bathroom, where there are perfectly good accommodations for changing a shit-filled sack from little child.  Also, they turned on a DVD player sans headphones so the rest of us could enjoy the crappy kids movie.  And another thing: when I first arrived at my seat, I was greeted by the grandmother playing with the two kids in my seat.  She then went, "Oh, you're the one sitting here." and spent ten minutes picking up toys and uncooperative kids to clear out and let me sit down (meanwhile backing up the line for people waiting to get on the plane.)  Did she just think that someone wasn't going to sit in that seat on an over-booked flight?
The flight from Rome to Warsaw was fine, but I was picked out by Customs for inspection, who scanned my bag.  The guard then spent a few minutes writing something down and said I could go.  Why the need to write down something when nothing happened?  They feel the need to note anything of importance and whatnot.  It's like when a few years ago I got off a late train and headed for the benches under the walkways in Centralna to wait for a friend.  Two policemen followed me and took down all my information in a little book then let me go.  Doesn't really make sense.

Polonia Seeps Into Everything

I have just come back to Warsaw on the best plane trip I can yet remember.  The seven-hour flight from Boston to Madrid flew by (pun intended.)  Maybe it was because I was in a good mood to be escaping the heat wave on the East Coast, maybe it was because I had an entire four-seat row to myself.  In any case, the hop from Boston to Madrid, then from Madrid to Warsaw went as smooth as can be.

I was Stateside for a wedding (one of the best I attended.)  Even though it was an American-German wedding (the bride was from Germany), I found little parts of Poland.  For instance, I recently purchased a mug for my mother.  It was traditional Polish pottery, hand-painted, etc.  While we were guests for the wedding, I found a mug in the cabinet that was not only the same type (same shape) of mug that I had gotten my mother, it was from the same set!  It was painted with the same design of flowers and such.  Further inspection, and inspection of the groom's cabinets, showed plenty more of these Polish mugs.
In both Boston and New York, there are statues to some of Poland's national heros: King Wladyslaw Jagiello and Tadeusz Kosciuszko.  It seems that Polonia (the name for the Polish Diaspora) has left its mark all over the place.  At least in the places I visited in ten days.

While in Boston, I met numerous people who all reacted in the same few ways: "I'm of Polish heritage."  "I just spent the last few days with Polish people."  "Warsaw?  Where is that?"  It's nice to be able to connect to people in such a way.

While in New York City, I really thought about the differences between the largest city in the US and the largest city in Poland.  Poles not from Warsaw often complain that Warsaw is fast-paced, dirty, the people unwelcoming, the traffic terrible.  Compared to Manhattan, Warsaw is a green, quaint, sleepy hamlet.  Manhattan is dirty; the roads are shitty; the traffic is unbelievable; the amount of homeless is depressing.  The cramped, traffic-clogged roads of Manhattan are a far cry from the relatively broad, seemingly-empty roads of Warsaw (NOTE: This does not apply to the Old Town.)
Brooklyn is has the neighborhood of Greenpoint (where, the brother of this author lives.)  It's been described as the Polishtown of New York, with the signs being in Polish and everyone speaking in Polish and ignoring those who actually speak in English.  My brother summed it up as: "It's the only place where I've seen a man stumble out of a bar cannot-stand-up-drunk at like three in the afternoon.  On a Wednesday."  (Plans to upload pictures of Greenpoint are presently stalled.  They will be uploaded later.)

Statues to King Wladyslaw and Kosciuszko in Central Park and Boston Commons respectively.

The Polish Consulate in New York City.

Plane Crash: After Effects: Memorial Plus Volcanic Ash

Iceland's Eyjafjallajokull (try saying that five times fast) has erupted, hurling plumes of ash into the sky. The ash has caused the cancellation of more than half of the EU's flights, and a great deal of transatlantic flight. The skies over Ireland, the UK, and Scandinavia have become virtual no-fly zones. Today, at around 9 AM, the cloud apparently nudged into Poland (near Szczecin.)

This ash plume is cause of some concern for Poland, since it may cause the cancellation of world leaders' plans to pay their respects to Kaczynscy on Sunday. The Poles were even mulling over delaying the funeral if Obama could not make it.

Volcanic ash is notorious in its ability to clog airplane engines (car engines have air filters, which make them less susceptible.) Mount St. Helen's eruption caused cancellations across the northwest, and volcanoes in Alaska routinely cause cancellations for Alaskan Airlines.

Volcanoes aside, there is still an uproar over the choice of the Wawel as a burial place. Facebook groups such as, I want to be buried at the Wawel, and, We Want a National Stadium Built on the Wawel (how retarded is that group?) have tens of thousands of members. The decision to bury them there basically came down to the Catholic Church, which usually throws its weight behind PiS, which in turn claims to be the party representing the Catholic Church. Oh, and I still don't care either way, but I think it's rather shameful the way that people are literally taking to the streets over this. Honestly, I think Kaczynscy being buried at the Wawel is a political move, and that it would be better if he was laid to rest in Powazki in Warsaw. Kaczynski was from Warsaw and probably should be laid to rest here as well. BUT, I can see that he might want to be buried in the Wawel. That's just my two cents.

Tomorrow, Saturday, there is a memorial for Lech Kaczynski at noon at Plac Pilsudskiego. There is a general prohibition of alcohol in Warsaw until 6 PM and all public transportation will be free. I'll be reporting on it and will write more about it tomorrow.

Back in Action

Well, it's been a long several months, but I'm back in Poland's borders.

I flew over on British Airlines, and I must say that I am not impressed. OK, their seats are fairly comfy, but the rest of the experience was less than great and they charged me $110 in bag fees (can you believe that shit?)

As usual, I was doomed to have the center seat on both flights next to the most horrible people on the plane (not counting screaming babies.) The entertainment system also crashed an hour into the flight and needed to be rebooted. I must say though, Surrogates and X-Men Origins: Wolverine were both pretty awful. I gave up bread for Lent, so I wasn't able to have the little roll that usually accompanies airline cuisine.

Going through Customs was the quickest ever and my bags were some of the first onto the carousel. The bus arrived shortly after I got to the stop. Unfortunately, the bus driver only had 1.10zl in change (a one-trip ticket (bilet jednorazowy) is 2.80zl) and all I had were a 10zl note and a 5zl coin. I eventually just gave him the 5zl and he gave me 1.10zl in change (the whole thing pissed him off good.)

I was told by numerous Poles that the weather was freezing and that snow drifts were high. The temp today and yesterday was in the fifties and the sun was bright and shining.

Now to get back some students and find a real job.

Now, after a good night's rest, I've planted most of my seeds which will be grown on the balcony. No cucumbers this year, but the tomatoes and the morning glories will be back in force.

Flight Over

Well, I'm back in Poland. I was greeted by overhanging clouds and a steady rain.

There's no real need for me to talk about my trip in great detail, but I will anyway.

It all started when E gave me a ride to Logan Airport. The day was searing hot; not a cloud in the sky or even a breeze of any sort. He had his little Garmin GPS set to avoid toll roads, so I got a pleasant tour of previously-unseen Mass, guided by some mechanical voice with a British accent (it even used the word 'roundabout' instead of "rotary.')

E dropped me off at Terminal A (NWA used to fly out of Terminal E, but ever since they were bought out by Delta they've switched to Terminal A.) I checked in with almost no problems (my first bag was two pounds over weight. I had to rummage in it and take out my tiny tripod and my paperback copy of Gödel, Escher, Bach. It ended up being two pounds under the limit. Great success. The automatic check-in machine was also kind of a piece of shit.)

My flight was at 7:05 PM, and I arrived at the airport at four, so I had some waiting to do. No problem, I watched some lectures from my online class and sat it out by the window, watching the ground crew load the A330. At 5:30 there came an announcement that our aircraft had a large mechanical problem (something to do with the nose landing gear.) They estimated that it would be fixed by 10 PM and that we'd fly out at 11:15. A short while later they announced again that the mechanical problem could not be fixed tonight and that they were flying in another plane from Minneapolis, which would be here around ten, and that we'd fly out at 11:15. I began to somewhat panic, since I was originally due to arrive in Amsterdam at 8:00 AM local time, and fly out at 9:45. Now they were saying that we'd arrive in Amsterdam no earlier than 10:00.

A long line formed at the gate desk, and stood up and joined at the back, intent on finding out when I was able to get a connection. While waiting in line I chatted to some fellow travelers and got my voucher NWA passed out. One was $25 off my next flight, another was 2,000 frequent flyer miles, and another was for a $10 voucher that could be used to buy some food in the terminal. I waited in line for about ninety minutes. When I was about two people away to speaking to representative, one of them got on the speaker and announced that Delta was not running the connections, on KLM-Royal Dutch Airlines was doing that, and Delta had no idea what we would have to do. We were directed to speak to KLM representatives when we arrived in Amsterdam.

Seeing as I was being picked up at Chopin Airport, I tried to find a way to contact them saying I wasn't arriving. Internet at Logan costs like $8 per day, and I wasn't about to do that. Strangely, I could access rottentomatoes.com, avclub.com, hulu.com, and YouTube (I was only able to watch one video, the rest had 'errors.') A guy sitting next to me inquired about the internet, and I replied that these must have been a fluke. He let me use his Blackberry Storm (it's kind of crappy, really. Not really a good GUI) to send an SMS.

I used my voucher at the nearby Game On bar. They were out of food (the kitchen had just closed), but they had to Sox game on. I got a pint of Samuel Adams Summer Ale (a fine pint indeed) and watched the Sox for a bit.

The plane arrived and we finally boarded. I got an aisle seat, sitting next to an older woman. I read a bit from a complimentary Wall Street Journal (Mexico's economy has taken a hit to the balls) and waited for take off. We sat on the plane for a bit, and the pilot announced that a circuit breaker had blown on a minor system and shouldn't cause much of a delay. It took a short bit, but we were airborne a little after 12:45 AM—over six hours later than our supposed take off.

I slept through most of the flight, missing breakfast. We landed in Amsterdam around 1:00 PM. The pilot had gone up to 39,000 feet and gunned the engines, cutting the seven-hour trip down to six. Going through customs was fairly easy, but the line was exceedingly long. The customs guard was smiley and pleasant. After seeing my old student visa for Germany, he asked, "You were in Germany? Sprechen Sie Deutsch?" I replied, "Ein bisschen." He gave a nod, "Ein bisschen."

It's strange, these days almost all check in is automatic. You get your tickets from a machine, and now they have these automatic transfer machines. I scanned the barcode from my original boarding pass and it printed me out a new one. My new flight was at 2:50, landing in Warsaw at 4:50. I could only hope that my luggage would follow me there.

Follow me it did. It was some of the first luggage to be unloaded onto the carousel. I had unfortunately gotten a middle seat between some fat old guy, who had terrible breath and smelled like an alcoholic, and some middle-aged woman. Halfway through the flight, the guy got up, and I suspected he went to the bathroom. He left a carryon bag under the seat, but he never returned. Either he had to take a massive hour-long shit, or he just moved to another open seat.

No one was there to greet me at the terminal, so I headed straight out to the bus stop. I was exceedingly fortunate when my bus arrived just as I walked up. On the way to the apartment there was a girl and her mother going for the First Communion (they got on at a different stop.) The little girl was dressed elegantly all in white, with a white wreath of flowers on her head and white gloves, white shoes, and a white purse (even a little fur-lined white shawl.) It was quite a clash and contrast of the prim and proper against the background of the everyday riffraff (like last summer at the wedding in Sosnowiec, where there was a a grubby beggar and her children on the church steps while everyone stood in their Sunday best in line to congratulate the bride and groom.) I really wanted to take a picture, but I didn't want them to get angry (I wasn't sure how the mother would react.)

Well, that's pretty much how I got here. Jet lag still eats at me, but I'll manage.

Movies

Poland is somewhat behind the curve in terms of box office releases. They're catching up now, with major blockbusters being released on the same date in Poland as they are in the US, but for many films they still lag behind. One such effect is that on the flight over to Poland, I can watch a film before it is even shown in theaters in Poland. Happy-Go-Lucky was one such film, and I got the pleasure of seeing all the posters up around Warsaw advertising its release.

It used to be really bad a few years ago. I remember visiting the theater and seeing posters for movies that were "coming soon", yet had already been released on DVD in the States months before. These days, most films are released simultaneously around the globe (Poland included.)

Flights

I used to have quite a bit of luck while traveling.  Now, I consider myself lucky if I reach my destination intact.

I used to love flying in planes, but now that I do so several times a year, I dread it.  I now enjoy waiting in the airport more than sitting in a cramped, crowded plane full of the dredges of humanity.  Say what you will but for me, it's the destination, not the journey.

It seems that I'm always next to the fattest person on the plane, and he never has a tightly sealed asshole.  My time next to these farting lumps of crap makes my air travel almost unbearable.

I flew to Poland for spring break once, leaving on Friday after classes and taking the bus to Boston.  The day before, it was a clear, sunny day, but now it turned into a gigantic blizzard that delayed the bus almost an hour.  I was to fly Northwest Airlines, and when I reached Logan almost all the flights were cancelled save for this one.  We were told that the plane was flying into Boston, and if it could land, then the flight would continue as scheduled.  The plane did not land and the flight was cancelled.  The ticket counter was mobbed with people and I was told that the earliest flight was on the following Monday.  I snapped at them, asking if any other airline would be able to connect me and they promptly bought me a ticket for a Swiss International Airlines flight on Sunday, arriving on Monday.

Oh, but that's not all.  On my return journey, my flight from Warsaw to Amsterdam was delayed.  I barely made my connection, from Amsterdam to Boston, but Northwest Airlines lost (with whom I flew back to the States), lost my luggage and left it in Amsterdam.  I got it back a few days later, but Customs had searched my bag (and repacked it quite shoddily) and removed two half-liter bottles of vodka.  Since it's legal for a non-US citizen to bring a liter of alcohol into the US, what are they doing removing a liter of alcohol from a citizen's baggage?  I called up NWA, who told me that I had a case and should call the TSA.  The guy on the other end told me flat out that I was probably not going to see either my Zubrowka or Wyborowa ever again.

A winter jaunt to Poland ended up quite similar.  I flew out on Air France, with a connection in Paris.  I had a nine-hour layover, which is plenty of time to go and explore Paris.  And explore Paris I did.

Paris is many people's favorite cities.  Now, I've only been there twice, and I won't deny that it has it's charm, it's culture, it's utter beauty and inspiring sites, it's history, gardens, restaurants, theaters, museums, churches, bridges, porn shops.  Paris is a city that everyone should visit within his or her lifetime; it's just too much to pass up.

The subway line from the airport to Paris proper is eight Euros one-way (and I thought public transportation was over priced here!)  I took the metro in and saw what I could.  Most of what I saw is in my Cheburashka post.  I didn't have tons and tons of time, because I still had a flight to take to Poland.  Plus, it was Christmas Eve.  I had heard that Paris is beautiful at Christmastime, and it is, but it kind of looked the same as it had when I was there six years earlier.  It was a clear, sunny day, and I got to watch the sunrise.  It was rather warm and all I needed to wear was a polar fleece.

I digress.  My tale about Paris is something for another time.  I should bring up that I arrived in Paris with about three hours of sleep in the last two days (no joke.)  So I had my fun in Paris, got back on the metro and went back to Charles De Gaulle.  I passed customs, and went to find my gate (remember, this was a connection flight so I didn't have to check in.)  Suddenly, after about a half-hour of being in the airport, the screen said my flight was cancelled!!!  Can you believe that shit?!  I went to the Air France desk, along with the other members of the flight, and was told by the lady at the desk that "the pilot didn't show up.  He was sick or on vacation, she didn't know."  I was fuming by this time, but she gave me a lunch voucher to use at the airport and a hotel voucher, which came with a dinner and breakfast voucher.  She told us that the next flight tomorrow would be at nine a.m. and that our baggage would be on the plane and meet us in Warsaw.

We (the stiffed travelers) waited outside on the curb for three hours for the shuttle to take us to our hotel.  Three hours.  Every so often a shuttle bus for a different hotel (or set of hotels) would come by and stop; we'd run up and ask them if they were going to our hotel.  Of course they would say no.  It didn't take long for us to ask, "Are you going within walking distance of the hotel?"  They would again reply that they weren't.  Finally, thankfully the shuttle bus arrived and spirited us to our destination.  I saw in anger and rage that our hotel was RIGHT NEXT to allllll the other hotels, to which these other shuttles were going.

We all got our rooms and I collapsed into bed at around 6:30, missing dinner, which started at 7:30.  I still regret not being able to get my full amount from that voucher.  I did use my breakfast voucher, and the breakfast was actually quite good (being a continental breakfast.)

Our flight to Poland was fine, but the assholes left my baggage back in Paris.  They couldn't even put it on the place after more than twenty-four hours.  It was Christmas Day at this time, but they did deliver my baggage to my door the very next day.

There are many tales such as these.  I can't recall every fat, disgusting person, next to whom I've had to sit (I tell about that horrific Russian lady in one of my first posts.)  I hope one day to rekindle my love of the actual activity of traveling from one place to another, but until then, I'm stuck in economy class.  I'm doomed to loose my luggage and circulation in my legs.

I actually like airplane food.  (It's the last thing I enjoy.)